Late night wanking
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Re: Late night wanking
by boovidge on Sat Jun 07, 2008 6:14 pm
i was being serious so..
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Re: Late night wanking
by ribbons69 on Sat Jun 07, 2008 9:24 pm
Often I'll watch porn on the computer with the sound off,whilst my girlfriend is asleep on the settee behind me.
Which reminds me of a joke;
"My mum caught me having a wank last night,I was a bit surprised as she's never woken up before,all these years she thought she had conjuntivitis."
Which reminds me of a joke;
"My mum caught me having a wank last night,I was a bit surprised as she's never woken up before,all these years she thought she had conjuntivitis."
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Re: Late night wanking
by James on Sat Jun 07, 2008 9:26 pm
Has anyone ever had what I will dub a "lol wank"? This means when you have a wank but for some reason it makes you laugh.
A few years back I was finishing off in the bathroom and my foot kicked one of those door stopper springs, and it made the most hilarious and well-timed cartoon "boing" sound!
Oh god, I have joined the Inane Banter Squad.
A few years back I was finishing off in the bathroom and my foot kicked one of those door stopper springs, and it made the most hilarious and well-timed cartoon "boing" sound!
Oh god, I have joined the Inane Banter Squad.
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Re: Late night wanking
by jonny_boy34 on Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:23 am
Sometimes I wank to an amazing song and the wank is ruined because the song is so good. This usually happens with Opeth.
Actually, that 'lol wank' has happened to me once or twice before, just because the porn I was watching was really hilarious. I remember once watching a threesome fun time joy, and when the silly American man came, he said "Oh my goodness" in such a hilarious way it was ridiculous.
Actually, that 'lol wank' has happened to me once or twice before, just because the porn I was watching was really hilarious. I remember once watching a threesome fun time joy, and when the silly American man came, he said "Oh my goodness" in such a hilarious way it was ridiculous.
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Re: Late night wanking
by terrorizer on Sun Jun 08, 2008 8:27 am
Spencer wrote:Wanking before bed is the best, sends me right off to sleep.
Wanker's cocoa!
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Re: Late night wanking
by Lev on Sun Jun 08, 2008 11:54 am
jonny_boy34 wrote:I remember once watching a threesome fun time joy, and when the silly American man came, he said "Oh my goodness" in such a hilarious way it was ridiculous.
I was in a shop yesterday and some DJ tosser was on the stereo, doing a live MC thing. And he said something along the lines of "Yeah, yeah, mcmcmc, letshearit letshearit bitches, yoyotrashingthemicletmeseeyougofuckingwwwiiiilld" *crowd goes wild* "ohhh my gosh".
Sounded so out of place. It was bloody funny.
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Re: Late night wanking
by Stevedot2 on Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:05 pm
Ina gaseebo (fuck the spelling!) in my auntie's garden, and on a train, a couple of times actually.
A lol story: I was really drunk and went at it for about an hour non stop, in the morning my member was swollen beyond belief! I think I may have told this before actually.
A lol story: I was really drunk and went at it for about an hour non stop, in the morning my member was swollen beyond belief! I think I may have told this before actually.
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Re: Late night wanking
by thrash metal maniac on Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:56 pm
Kilgore~Let 'Em Burn wrote:I wank at work on a stunningly regular basis, plus there's no lock on the bog door so it adds an element of danger.
Danger wank
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Re: Late night wanking
by STD_Caps on Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:10 pm
I once had a wank on my round friend's house. I found road works went up right close so if anyone came near they'd think I was having a piss and cracked one out. Only one person passed me and they were on the other side of the road. It was about seven in the evening. Thinking about it, mot normal people would consider that a little depraved.
Wanking is great.
Wanking is great.
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Re: Late night wanking
by terrorizer on Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:38 pm
Stevedot2 wrote:in the morning my member was swollen beyond belief!
Happens to me most mornings.
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Re: Late night wanking
by Metal Iain on Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:56 pm
See what's horrible: if, like me, you wank whilst your lying down and you end up with jizz in your belly button. I guess it's funny when you've not had one in a while and your spray is so powerful that you end up with jizz on your chest.
My worst experience in recent times was when I was staying in a hostel in Estonia. I had a Bulgarian room-mate who never seemed to go out. After four days I had to wank into the sink. I warned my mate mainly because it was the biggest payload I've ever seen come out of my knob. I don't think I'd gone without a wank for more than three days since I was 13.
My worst experience in recent times was when I was staying in a hostel in Estonia. I had a Bulgarian room-mate who never seemed to go out. After four days I had to wank into the sink. I warned my mate mainly because it was the biggest payload I've ever seen come out of my knob. I don't think I'd gone without a wank for more than three days since I was 13.
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Re: Late night wanking
by Stevedot2 on Sun Jun 08, 2008 9:46 pm
Metal Iain wrote:I guess it's funny when you've not had one in a while and your spray is so powerful that you end up with jizz on your chest.
Or in your mouth.
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Re: Late night wanking
by boovidge on Sun Jun 08, 2008 9:48 pm
anyone given themselves a pink eye before?
Metal Iain wrote:This board has nothing to do with the 'scene'. It's more just about 10 or so pricks who used to like Thrash that, for one reason or another, waste a lot of time posting on here.
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Re: Late night wanking
by Lev on Sun Jun 08, 2008 10:24 pm
Just stop.
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Re: Late night wanking
by Kilgore~Let 'Em Burn on Mon Jun 09, 2008 8:54 pm
I feel nauseous.
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